| welp read the msg ... and i geuss its alright to cry .. i love her so much that shes basically saying she happy with out me huh lol shit drink too that one! fuck this song is speaking shit ... but yea i geuss guys longest relationship ever the time didnt mean anything the break up to make up if all that couldnt keep it together then what does...
the love was there
the bond was there
bonnie and clyde
ride or die
hustle was there what is it marrige im ready... kids? i want them? love ? yes... what is it.. growing old together yes i want it!!...
well then how come im not with the woman i love... i honestly give up and for me to say that with all i never want and now want honestly i dont want it no more i cant start over no! hell no ... i dunno but shit my cup is empty i cant think right now bye
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| tired and drinking at least i got ciggs thou ..go to work tomorrow and still no sign of fallon when she promised aye should i really intervien in her happyness with new gf karisa .. but i dont want to !? fuck it should i just sit back?
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| Listening to bust the windows out ya car... 18th time since yesterday im hooked and i feel like shit.. of course~ havent written on here in a long ass time brings me back some a whole 180 ... "left my initials with the crowbar" that shits hard lol hehe i remeber that and you know who u are puta lol but yea ... got out this amazing relationship... well what i thought was amazing or i can say she was amazing! you know how u have that last chance type of situation and you fuck up and the fix it again but then thats the last fucking chance and u try to show affection pretend the problems not there look the the future and with out notice i snap now aint that shit but i love her and i cant do nothing i cant fight because wat i promissed didnt happen and y do a circle plus her mind is made up pretty much and i know she has someone who is going to love her and now at this point im not going to interupt ima sit back and relax and enjoy my show work on my self and issues fuck it and blow it out movin on will be a lil hard but i realize it has to be done honestly fuck a relationship that shit brain washes a bitch lol hehe i need my social life back just got in like at 20 mins ago from some coffe with siya and earlier saw anzel and the the weekend at crystal my puta good time wit my puerto rican family like old time in nyc !!! man but yea ima just chill more do what i wana smoke if more fuck it ima live for me my way no more change lol im on protest fuck it! and ppl enjoy ya life pop dem bottles
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| well im on my 5th beer and well hmmm its only 12:54 pm... hey im feeling fine..but .ummm i dunno something on my mind.. i have a certain person on my mind.. honestly.. i told mybuddy rockii my bitch...hmm i miss her anywho well im tired drank my ass off our new pad is nice as hell furniture could be better but i like the set up my closet is the shit though.. hmmm beer and pizza man i feel like a college student minus the fuckin top ramen noodles... anyway im drink samore salude putas
Lidz
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yes that right lidia ... wanted to marry some one
... it was sappose to be nov 22nd yep u geussed it on my bday
i flipped shit i fuckin flipped loosing the girl i love till this day and having a big hole in my heart but who cares about that huh lol
so loosing the girl i love that 1# then that same night i got mugged yes now how cool is that i got robbed ! now aint that some good luck huh?
yep! so thats 2# ohh now hear this.. because of the muggin i had the rest of my rent money and ohh now im getting evicted ! ohh yAY!!!!
This is some good ass time for real 
huh loving it.. back to the wall cant pay shit or i should say i cant catch up! me and the love of my life but all she seems good at is bailing on me when shit gets hard and im left to get robbed evicted and homeless but naw its okay i dont have family here im all fuckin alone yea there are some friends but who house i can actually crash at meanwhile besides crystal witch i did for the weekend and it hella far ... no one ... i dont have that so lidia is going to sell wat i can and try my best and get the fuck up outta here huh lol damn it cant get better than this seriously... i wanna just drink my self to death for reals yo! fuck this shit... my heart is all fucked i cant deal with the fact that she has someone already im done i dont want to be here my life went downhill fuck a hill it jumped off a cliff and i regret everything! i regret california i regret the people i met who lead me to her and i regret it all and yes on prop 8 no fuckin marriage cause when i actually want it nada .. fuck this and fuck it all look all my bitches and niggas in nyc dont dat a cali motherfucker to much shit! no no no u see one and run the fuck away! just run dont ask no questions dont answer no questions fuck it! and run ... i should have learned in 2 yrs and i got the fuckin russian roullete end of the gun! 